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Talking to Kids (and Informing Ourselves) About Race, Racism, Prejudice, & the Protests

Tina Payne Bryson, PhD

Tina Payne Bryson, PhD

· 1 min read

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Many in our community are just waking up to the reality of the systemic racism that prevails in our nation. Others have been painfully aware of its existence throughout their lives. As we all seek to more fully understand these realities and find meaningful ways to respond and enact change, one of the best steps we can take is to continue to educate ourselves. And we want to find ways to talk to our children as well. You’ll find below a few starting places we can all use to more fully inform ourselves and talk to our kids about race and racism.

We know these conversations with our children won’t always be easy. But it’s so important. For some of us, this won’t be our first experience of talking with our kids about prejudice. For others, it might be the first time we’re addressing the uncomfortable topics of race and privilege. In both cases, the CFC wants to support you in helping your kids understand how to recognize and combat various forms of racism, know what to do when they see it, talk about the images and headlines they might be seeing on the news and social media, and foster self-love and promote a healthy cultural identity. 

NY Times article on books to help parents explain racism and the current protests.

Wall Street Journal article on how to talk with children about the protests with advice from pediatricians, educators and other experts.

Kid-friendly movies to help teach kids about racism.

Anti-racism library resources by LeanIn.org.

Tina Payne Bryson, PhD

Written by

Tina Payne Bryson, PhD

Tina Payne Bryson, PhD is the founder of The Center for Connection, a New York Times bestselling author, and a leading expert in child development and parenting.

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Frequently Asked Questions About Talking to Kids About Race and Racism

At what age should I start talking to my child about race?

Children notice racial differences as early as six months old, so it is never too early to start. For young children, simple conversations about skin color and fairness are a good beginning. As they grow, the conversations can become more detailed and nuanced.

What if I do not know what to say?

It is okay to not have all the answers. What matters is that you are willing to learn alongside your child. Start with age-appropriate books and resources, and be honest when you do not know something. Saying 'Let us learn about this together' is a powerful message.

How do I respond if my child witnesses or experiences racism?

Listen first. Let your child share what happened and how it made them feel. Validate their feelings and help them name the experience. Then talk about what you can do together, whether that is speaking up, finding support, or simply being there for each other.

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